I'm never going to feel pretty or cute or beautiful in a feminine way. I'm never going to get that and it hurts a little...a lot. There's this want for that that I want. I want to have had a cute little girl moment in my life and I'm not suddenly wanting to be one of those baby people but cute little Shirley Temple treatment. But I'm never going to get that or the pretty pretty princess moment or the prom moment or the bride moment or any of those other times girls dream about because I'm never going to be that pretty girl no matter what I do. The bitch is mad and sad and all round bitchy right now.

Getting that girlie urge again.

What is it about hose stockings and nailpolish that is just such a turn on? I love it when I have my legs shaved and covered in sheer form hugging hose and my toenails are either red or black. It's heaven. I feel pretty and sexy and can't help but touch them as much as possible. It's just so freakin' Yummy.

Went out and got me some nice stuff:
since I couldn't find a sheer shirt got this:
 

Wanted a female version of the shoes I normally wear so got this:

And just for the fun of it:

Fun is finding out you can walk in your first 4" heels.

Is there anyone out there that wants to chat on Msn messenger? I need another CD to talk to.

Wedding Daze
By Kim Torence
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Phone sales is the seventh level of hell. You have to be as kind nice and corgel as you can be and still you're a bitch if you don't help them the way they want to be helped. I hate people sometimes I really do and I'm sure the job doesn't help but I have to keep it because it's the only money coming in and we like food and shelter. I tend to be a problem solver and a peace maker and the way this place goes I'm burning my soul out...but I can't leave till things get better it's the only stable thing we got...makes me want to cry, and scream and run away. I feel like a little girl lost in the woods in a torn, burned princess costume after being attacted. I don't know where to run

Feel to look at some of the stories I wrote sometime ago and tell me how much they suck they were my tries at transgender body swap fiction.

Creativity- Your inner power is

Creativity! Any of The Arts-music, dance,

pure art, drama, creative writing-are your

passion. You love the way you can control

what happens to you and your life while you

participate in any of The Arts, and you can

push your emotions aside when you do so. You

at times can feel very depressed and alone,

and yet it only further fuels your love for

your art. Life to you can often seem bitter

and cruel, a world of darkness with only a

few tiny flares of light, stretched out far

in between one another. In a way youre

confused with what you want in your life, and

find it hard to trust people. Because of this

people of the outside world see you as cold

and uncaring, yet those who befriend you love

you a lot, and know you are only very lonely

and hurting. Boys are intrigued by your

mysterious mask, and one day, one of them

will reach passed your barriers and care for

you the way you so desperately want to be

cared for. Dont let the popular people get

you down; you are a wonderful person, and

without the creativity you bring the world,

it would be a very boring place. Love

yourself for who you are, for you are very

special.
Boy/Girl who will sweep you off your feet:

A sweet, sensitive man/woman. The guy/girl

who understands your need for being alone

sometimes. Yet also someone who would do

anything to protect you for being hurt, even

if it means giving up their life.
Your stone: Jade
Your power: Dreaming/Imagination
Your element: Dream
A quote that applies to you: Dare to

dream, dare to fly, dare to be the ever

chosen one to touch the sky.


What's your inner power? (Girls only sorry. Beautiful anime pictures, lengthy results)
brought to you by Quizilla

I got:
Barbie Girl by Aqua
I'll be that Girl by Barenaked Ladies
Dude(Looks Like a Lady) by Aerosmith
I wish I was a Girl by Violent Delight
Lola by the Kinks
I know what boys Want by Vitamin C
Man! I feel Like a woman by Shania Twain

Any other songs along this theme I can add?

Away Trips
By Kim Torence

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Edward Pickman Derby's Tale
By Kim Torence
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Igor's Adventures in Ginger
By Kim Torence
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I love sheer fabrics like stockings and hose and the feel of filling a bra and the tightness of fitted or stretching fabrics holding me in.